Last week I had my second grade students share what they wanted to be when they grew up. I was interested to see their responses because I'm 26 and for the last seven years I could've sworn I wanted to be an Event Planner when I grew up... And now I'm grown up (sorta) and I changed career paths so drastically that it has me questioning if we ever know what we want to be when we grow up. Some of the students were so adamant about becoming teachers, zookeepers, professional athletes, that you'd swear nothing would change their minds. But my absolute favorite responses came from the little girls who wrote that their dream job was to be a mom. At such a young age they wanted nothing more than to care for babies and have a family. It was precious, because same. But then when I heard the comments from the little boys in class I was shook. They said things like "being a mom isn't a job, all girls are moms" and "moms have jobs too you know". At six and seven years old these girls were being squashed by the patriarchal society that is this world and it made me mad.
My favorite paper that was turned in was from a little girl who said, "When I grow up I want to be a mom and a dad", and to that I am here to say f**k the patriarchy. She knows already that you don't need a man to be successful as a parent. The little boy next to her said "well you can't be a dad because you're a girl", which to be fair he isn't wrong, but also to think deeper you don't need a man to be a parent after the deed is done. In fact, any mom out there that is doing it alone right now is being the mom and the dad. So maybe she only has a mom and she wants to be like her. And maybe her mom is a dominant example of a strong female presence and she doesn't want a man to share that with. Who knows, but the point is that no boy gets to tell you how you feel or how you should live out the life you want to. Sure being a mom doesn't pay the bills, in fact it usually adds to your bills, but who are men to tell us that aspiring to be stay at home women is frowned upon?
If you are lucky enough to be able to stay at home with your children and you can financially survive, then to each his own. In a world dominated by men, let women be what and who they want to be. That isn't the choice a man gets to make for us women. Take away the patriarchy and make room for the matriarchy because it's 2019 so why can't seven year olds want to be a mom when they grow up? One day the harsh reality will come that they probably have to commit to a job because being a mom doesn't earn a salary, but they are children for now, so let them dream. They don't even know the reality of bills and debt and finances yet, so being a mom that gets to spend the day raising babies and playing house sounds like a fantasy. Don't squash the fantasy for your own children, and if you're a man, definitely don't squash the fantasy for a woman.
Author - mallory
I've always lived a wild life, so here I am to document it for the world... be ready for some fun adventures, xoxo.